now i felt it

Uni life was okay, didnt expect much frm it. though the lecturers took me by surprise (awesomely sarcastic, cute, cool etc) and heck, the textbooks are 800++ pages each. you might have heard some of ur frens who took business course saying : "im sooo lucky that i chosed this course, i oni need to go 3 days lecture and its an easy course etc". you might as well ditch that fren for making u miserable becuz fmo, finance is probably the same pain in the ass as any of ur courses. but if u're so passionate bout it and u'll strong enough to put up with it, u'll do fine. i guess.

that aside, my life path is getting narrower and it seems there had been signs of dead end. thank God no road blocks i've already predicted that it'll happen to me someday, though i never thought it was this soon. looking at other ppl suffering frm it gave me that feeling that it'll come for me. now that i hv to put on hold for many things, some might even need to give up on. going overseas to further my studies has always been my goal but now my chances are even slimmer than b4. but i'll earn that chance by all means.

lol it sounded quite bad at first, but later on i didnt mind it at all. i've seen my closer relatives struggled to get by and look at them now, living life to the fullest with promising jobs. i really wanna juz travel to the mountains and shout till my hearts' content, wanna juz shout at Him for being selfish, for making a fool out of me, for letting me get tempted by false hopes. lol then again, who am i to complain, many ppl out there been through alot worse, and i'm here planting my fat butt on a comfy chair, looking at a not so but still good tech com screen, surfing the net at 1mb intenet speed. God must be so disappointed at me for being ungrateful at that time. lol that really made me depress for a whole week, i slept alot for that few days, juz trying to be numb.

while im studying this course, i wonder i'll b able to follow my father's footsteps. and hv that manager attitude dealing with difficult bosses. in order to be like my dad, i'll juz end it here and start eating pain killers while going through the textbooks.
and happy white day! SUPPORT SINGLE AWARENESS DAY mates
bye~