Fogs clouded every road i am going to take...

*Fuh...
taking another break.
lol...i took alot of breaks and i'm feeling guilty right now. wth.
so...it's a long time since the last update.
exams are near..yes...but partly because there's nothing worth to write.
now i think there is...
now to think of it...i always update my special occasions here rather my thoughts. lol
quite amusing...then i guess its rare for me to actually tell the world what i feel and think.
lol...but for the feeling part...its quite confidential.
ha! i wrote 2 post about my emo-ness.
then this will be my third and final time i be emo.........

I wanna learn ALOT of stuff, the almost impossible ones too. most of the time i brag about it...my friends will say: you everything also want...you wanna do this you want to do that. lol...i wasn't able to reply...or rather juz wanna shut up to shut them up about this topic. haha...but then everyone wud want to do something that they're interested before they die, right? i want to learn japanese and korean language...i want to take up violin...i want to become an actress....i want to learn photography...and there are million and 1 things i want to do and is almost capable of because i still have my complete body.

then juz last week i told my dad i want to buy a digital camera so that to learn photography. and he was like : =.= no...dun waste money on those. concentrate on studying. and that moment i was juz SHOCKED!!! not of my dad's comment but it was something else. i didnt know what it was until later that night. i realized the "want" word comes in a different meaning to me. and now i compare it with the word "need". lol.

lets take for example...my friend's going japan in persuing of her interest/career. i am also DYING? WANTING to go japan. however...that is what i want, not what i NEED. another example : i want to take up violin because i love listening to violin's pitch, comparing it to the word "need"...not worth comparing. Now, my career plans : i have an interest in acting field...i want to become an actress. but its not something that i NEED. infact i don't have any future plans that i NEED to pursue right now. so its up to the word "try". lol...wanted to put "try and see" guh. quite alot of options...1 non realisic + 3 "enough to support myself" options. haha...acting is the non-realistic 1 and also the only 1 my parents have objections of. the rest are phamarcy...dentistry...and...fianance which are recommended by my dearest father.
other than acting field...i set my eyes on phamarcy. till now...i have NO idea which to choose. and so...i made a decision to try. lol i used to hate finance because its all about money...fuh boring. now...i'm interested to know more about it...see if its something worth trying.

God gave me so many opportunities...to try out...to let me realize his plans that he layed out for me. to know which path i need to choose, what road i need to take.
I juz found out he gave me a sign to my question about opportunities. there's this movie "evan almighty" broadcasted on HBO. haha...i didnt get to watch last year so i asume its as good as bruce almigthy. the jokes wasnt as funny as BA but the message in it was enough to blow me away. It was this 1 scene where morgan freeman hving a chat with evan's wife about him being phsycho of building the ark that God told him to.



its somewhere in the middle...juz incase some of you would like to skip the front part. but i strongly encourage you to watch the whole thing. i love the way morgan freeman send the message across...it juz make so much sense. ^^ it made my day...because God answered my prayer. happy happy.
many things that we prayed for, God will answer and had answered. or many of us have not pray for it, God still helped. we may think oh its because of my capability that i achieved so much, its my choice to be independent that i have made it this far and we, so overconfident and arrogant...overlooked the signs that he gave us.

i wrote so much. gosh.
guess its time to stop...
but last of all...i would like to say...
^^ GOD LOVE YOU!!! (dun flame me ya...i know someone will)
HAHA!!!

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Raefeli
Beyond greatness, is goodness - from Wizard of Oz 2013
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